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Think too much

Here I am, sitting in my physics class, just waiting for it to begin. I have had a lot on my mind in the last day and I figured why not let the world know about it, what could it hurt. And besides, I have found that writing in the thing is like a therapy for me. If you have read my previous entries, ok just the last one, you will notice that I talk about a certain boy. Well I have some personal things that are eating at me. Tonight I have to talk to him and tell him that I need to figure out a) the reasons that my last relationship failed and b) If I'm even playing in that league, if you get what I'm saying. If not, in black and white, I need to figure out my sexuality before jumping into a relationships and breaking hearts (which apparently I have done already). I feel really horrible about pretty much leading this guy on and then not even a week later, I have to 'break' up with him...if we were even dating. Not sure about that because we really never talked about it, I just kind of came to that conclusion myself. I guess its better to tell him earlier and not lie to myself. On a brighter note, I found a women at the Women's Center who is gay and I think will really help me understand my own thoughts and feelings. I set up an appointment for tomorrow morning and I'm really grateful that there are people out there that I can talk to about this kind of thing. I know I have trust issues with men in particular, but I think this runs a little deeper than that.